Difficulty photographing our Children, go Candid?

[Jon]

Over the years, me and my missus have always taken photos and videos of our family. But now it is difficult for us both, to get any decent photos or videos. At a birthday party the other week, my missus tried getting some photos. The adult children started getting grumpy, while the grandchildren started ducking and hiding their faces. We both gave up after a while, and just enjoyed the party.

The adult children and their grandchildren continued what they were doing, and that was taking selfies, to post on social media. We thought, ok we will just take them candidly in future. Just trying to figure out, what has changed?

 

[Wilt]

Nothing has changed, folks have simply gotten tired of being interrupted from what they are otherwise doing, to take posed photos, over and over and over!

Why certain people feel that 'the only way to take a photo' is to get everyone to 'stop, and look at the camera, and smile', and then go on with life has never ceased to amaze me...one friend from college (50 years) always does that...he does not comprehend the taking of candids. And everyone is tired of his incessant, "Hey everyone...smile!" compulsion with photos, but they continue to put up with it, but their annoyance is not hidden...the teens deliberately make faces at his camera, ruining his desired shots!

Every shot need not be a posed group photo...just let the folks have fun doing what they are doing, and capture them doing it! Capture a snapshot of LIFE as it occurs.

 

[Jon]

Nothing has changed, folks have simply gotten tired of being interrupted from what they are otherwise doing, to take posed photos, over and over and over!

Why certain people feel that 'the only way to take a photo' is to get everyone to 'stop, and look at the camera, and smile', and then go on with life has never ceased to amaze me...one friend from college (50 years) always does that...he does not comprehend the taking of candids. And everyone is tired of his incessant, "Hey everyone...smile!" compulsion with photos, but they continue to put up with it, but their annoyance is not hidden...the teens deliberately make faces at his camera, ruining his desired shots!

Every shot need not be a posed group photo...just let the folks have fun doing what they are doing, and capture them doing it! Capture a snapshot of LIFE as it occurs.

No, these were not posed photos. We were simply taking photos of our family, at a party we had arranged. We were taking photos as we were mingling, we did not get the family to stop and pose.

 

[Wilt]

No, these were not posed photos. We were simply taking photos of our family, at a party we had arranged. We were taking photos as we were mingling, we did not get the family to stop and pose.

Your earlier comment, "We thought, ok we will just take them candidly in future. " made it sound as if your attempts were not 'candids', but posed.

 

[Jon]

Nothing has changed, folks have simply gotten tired of being interrupted from what they are otherwise doing, to take posed photos, over and over and over!

Why certain people feel that 'the only way to take a photo' is to get everyone to 'stop, and look at the camera, and smile', and then go on with life has never ceased to amaze me...one friend from college (50 years) always does that...he does not comprehend the taking of candids. And everyone is tired of his incessant, "Hey everyone...smile!" compulsion with photos, but they continue to put up with it, but their annoyance is not hidden...the teens deliberately make faces at his camera, ruining his desired shots!

Every shot need not be a posed group photo...just let the folks have fun doing what they are doing, and capture them doing it! Capture a snapshot of LIFE as it occurs.

No, we did not do that, we did not ask them to pose. We simply pointed the camera, to take a photo as things were unfolding.

 

[Jon]

Your earlier comment, "We thought, ok we will just take them candidly in future. " made it sound as if your attempts were not 'candids', but posed.

Without them seeing us taking the photos, that is what I meant. Sorry for the confusion.

 

[Jon]

Nothing has changed, folks have simply gotten tired of being interrupted from what they are otherwise doing, to take posed photos, over and over and over!

Why certain people feel that 'the only way to take a photo' is to get everyone to 'stop, and look at the camera, and smile', and then go on with life has never ceased to amaze me...one friend from college (50 years) always does that...he does not comprehend the taking of candids. And everyone is tired of his incessant, "Hey everyone...smile!" compulsion with photos, but they continue to put up with it, but their annoyance is not hidden...the teens deliberately make faces at his camera, ruining his desired shots!

Every shot need not be a posed group photo...just let the folks have fun doing what they are doing, and capture them doing it! Capture a snapshot of LIFE as it occurs.

Sorry to have annoyed you.

 

[joayne]

It seems if we start taking photos early in young lives, they do burn out, don't they ..
Yet, their selfies on the phone are great ..

 

[Jon]

It seems if we start taking photos early in young lives, they do burn out, don't they ..
Yet, their selfies on the phone are great ..

I am not taking nearly as many photos now anyway. I tend to do more vlogging now, I document events while out and about. Mainly for amusing the family, and my own self interest. I don't mind being in front of the camera.

 

[joayne]

I hate being in front of the camera, so at least I have some empathy for those who are camera shy ...
One of the early photos of me by my parents shows me glowering.

 

[Capn Jack]

Nothing has changed, folks have simply gotten tired of being interrupted from what they are otherwise doing, to take posed photos, over and over and over!

Why certain people feel that 'the only way to take a photo' is to get everyone to 'stop, and look at the camera, and smile', and then go on with life has never ceased to amaze me...one friend from college (50 years) always does that...he does not comprehend the taking of candids. And everyone is tired of his incessant, "Hey everyone...smile!" compulsion with photos, but they continue to put up with it, but their annoyance is not hidden...the teens deliberately make faces at his camera, ruining his desired shots!

Every shot need not be a posed group photo...just let the folks have fun doing what they are doing, and capture them doing it! Capture a snapshot of LIFE as it occurs.

It was the same in film days, except the young people weren't taking selfies.

 

[Jon]

Most of the time I think the kids moan for moaning sake. I don't really think they are bothered really. They will moan about anything. But we still love them.

 

[West Coast Birder]

I think it is good during family gatherings to set aside some time, say after dinner or right before, to take photos. My parents recently passed and it is one of my great regrets that I don’t have great shots of them. Passable shots yes, but I could have easily had them pose a bit more and have those images now. Not to be all morbid or fatalistic here of course, but even for kids, it’s nice to have good shots to look at and reminisce later. Joayne, I know exactly what you are saying. My wife and I were looking at my older son’s photos from a few years ago (he is 23 and working towards a PhD now) and I can’t done a single one where he isn’t scowling or making faces at the camera or whatever. An opportunity missed.

 

[Jon]

I think it is good during family gatherings to set aside some time, say after dinner or right before, to take photos. My parents recently passed and it is one of my great regrets that I don’t have great shots of them. Passable shots yes, but I could have easily had them pose a bit more and have those images now. Not to be all morbid or fatalistic here of course, but even for kids, it’s nice to have good shots to look at and reminisce later. Joayne, I know exactly what you are saying. My wife and I were looking at my older son’s photos from a few years ago (he is 23 and working towards a PhD now) and I can’t done a single one where he isn’t scowling or making faces at the camera or whatever. An opportunity missed.

That is the reason I take photos, to help me remember a lovely memorable moment. Or to refer back to an incident, just to prove something did take place. Provided it has not been photoshopped, of course.

 

[Skygod44]

Hi there Jon,
I don't know what gear you're using, but classical "street candid photography" techniques would probably get something approaching what you want.
1) Use a small, fairly wide-angle, prime lens, pre-focused when you're in the kitchen.
2) Set the aperture to something like f5.6 or f8.
3) Wander around, and snap away without looking at the rear screen or viewfinder.
4) Go somewhere else and check how you've done.
5) Try some more.

It takes practice, and there can/will be all sorts of results. But if you try the technique of pointing your camera in approximately the right direction while shooting various objects first, you'll learn a great method.

Cheers for now,
Simon

 

[Keith_R]

The adult children started getting grumpy, while the grandchildren started ducking and hiding their faces. We both gave up after a while, and just enjoyed the party.

That's a pretty unambiguous expression of their wishes, Jon - waving your camera at them is obviously and unequivocally unwelcome.

You could always honour their wishes, couldn't you? It's not like they haven't been clearly indicated.

20 years a Data Protection/privacy "subject matter expert" before I took early retirement in 2019 - I'm with them all the way. Although the UK law around privacy "rights" is complicated and nuanced, it is a fundamental principle and expectation that if someone makes it clear that they don't want you photographing them, you don't. Whoever it is.

Otherwise you're just objectifying ("to treat a person... as if they had no feelings, opinions, or rights of their own") your kids for your own satisfaction, and that sucks.

 

[Skygod44]

That's a pretty unambiguous expression of their wishes, Jon - waving your camera at them is obviously and unequivocally unwelcome.

You could always honour their wishes, couldn't you? It's not like they haven't been clearly indicated.

20 years a Data Protection/privacy "subject matter expert" before I took early retirement in 2019 - I'm with them all the way. Although the UK law around privacy "rights" is complicated and nuanced, it is a fundamental principle and expectation that if someone makes it clear that they don't want you photographing them, you don't. Whoever it is.

Otherwise you're just objectifying ("to treat a person... as if they had no feelings, opinions, or rights of their own") your kids for your own satisfaction, and that sucks.

Keith, I'm intrigued by that, having been out of the UK for 20 years.

So, if a criminal is smashing car windows, and someone videos them, but said crimo declares in Queen's English, "I wish and demand that you cease and desist from making any photographic or video images of me! And furthermore I demand that you delete any and all taken up to now!" then their request would have to be followed?

 

[West Coast Birder]

That's a pretty unambiguous expression of their wishes, Jon - waving your camera at them is obviously and unequivocally unwelcome.

You could always honour their wishes, couldn't you? It's not like they haven't been clearly indicated.

20 years a Data Protection/privacy "subject matter expert" before I took early retirement in 2019 - I'm with them all the way. Although the UK law around privacy "rights" is complicated and nuanced, it is a fundamental principle and expectation that if someone makes it clear that they don't want you photographing them, you don't. Whoever it is.

Otherwise you're just objectifying ("to treat a person... as if they had no feelings, opinions, or rights of their own") your kids for your own satisfaction, and that sucks.

Keith, methinks you’re going a bit overboard here. Jon is talking about taking photos at family gatherings. Yes, you don’t want to annoy or inconvenience people too much but one can’t be quoting the privacy rule book for these occasions. Moreover, I think the subjects should also be willing to accept a trivial amount of inconvenience for the greater good that creating tokens of memories. One has to find that happy medium with some give and take on both sides.

 

[Jon]

Hi there Jon,
I don't know what gear you're using, but classical "street candid photography" techniques would probably get something approaching what you want.
1) Use a small, fairly wide-angle, prime lens, pre-focused when you're in the kitchen.
2) Set the aperture to something like f5.6 or f8.
3) Wander around, and snap away without looking at the rear screen or viewfinder.
4) Go somewhere else and check how you've done.
5) Try some more.

It takes practice, and there can/will be all sorts of results. But if you try the technique of pointing your camera in approximately the right direction while shooting various objects first, you'll learn a great method.

Cheers for now,
Simon

Thanks for the reply,

I am using a small compact camera, and I do try and be discreet as possible.
Yes I do all the techniques you suggest, but maybe I am getting slow in my old age.

Maybe I should use a phone, as nobody would notice another phone being constantly looked at.

 

[Jon]

That's a pretty unambiguous expression of their wishes, Jon - waving your camera at them is obviously and unequivocally unwelcome.

You could always honour their wishes, couldn't you? It's not like they haven't been clearly indicated.

20 years a Data Protection/privacy "subject matter expert" before I took early retirement in 2019 - I'm with them all the way. Although the UK law around privacy "rights" is complicated and nuanced, it is a fundamental principle and expectation that if someone makes it clear that they don't want you photographing them, you don't. Whoever it is.

Otherwise you're just objectifying ("to treat a person... as if they had no feelings, opinions, or rights of their own") your kids for your own satisfaction, and that sucks.

"Waving your camera at them" No, this is something I did not do. After reading the rest of your post, I will simply say thanks for your reply.